marcus aurelius'blog

i became enamored (look it up!) w/ the ramblings of an Emperor--- somehow stumbled onto it=-----his famous
Meditations. then having read it couple times---- more investigating (me). turns out he supposedly wrote in while he was in the field, leading troops probably in what we now call his spare time.we are told we are seeing a translation. he wrote, it is claimed, in Greek. even though his native tongue must have been Latin or Roman. so here's a guy full time military, writing down HIS THOUGHTS, we're told, for his own entertainment? in GREEK? to himself. oh, o.k. he not only enjoyed writing stuff down in Greek, but maybe later, he' read it. in greek. there are some good things in there. we are informed he had been raised & believed in the Spartan wayof life. this is valuable in clarifying precursors of later religious thought, perhaps of christianity.

there are probably people even today people busily scribbling away their thoughts in Greek. this would be good if some British scholar would translate it. but i may not go there. i like the internet, in english.

i'm rather old to be just now discovering zen, but it apparently has always done fine w/o me.
my reading mainly jacob needleman & of course thomas merton has begun to lead me twd the topic.

my 1st exposure was, like the other 2, after the fact. ie, i was at the beach sev. yrs ago flying my little kite & later i realized i had been experiencing a 'zen moment". now i can sit in my favorite chair & watch the birds come to the feeder. but when the red-bellied woodpecker comes & positions hisself so his back is twd me, i count that as a z.m. keeps coming back, TG.

then other day i had parked the car & was headed into the big box, when i noticed a sparrow taking a bath in the shallow puddle in the pkg lot, so i paused a moment until he/she left & i realized----ANOTHER z.m. its all sort of joyous---a discovery in old age but now ive found a new focus. something to look fwd to in old age is not common. as nr as i can tell however, this experience wouldn't qualify as Zen.

now, about O.A. soon i'll be 78 y.o. but i really dont have any wisdom except to say, how i've discovered 'the meaning of life'. I like how Tolstoy is quoted,----something to the effect none of it means a damned thing.' , but some things do become clearer. i mentioned recently to a frend, how much insight we can find in hindsight. but i have actually figured out a topic for another blog that no one will read. about an Emperor!!!! Marcus Aurelius, so watch for it!!!

ruminations2009

most of us never give any thought to ordinary breathing. maybe when we puff & say i'm allouta breath. but growing up i guess i was short of b. & didnt notice it. i guess i had a heart condition that caused it & evidently intermittent & MAYBE random. had physicals over the yrs, electrocardiology, etc. apparently nothing ever showed although once when i was bedrid w/ the flu, dR.came to see me & the usual listening, axed me if i knew i had a ht murmur. i replied, no, not that i knew of, & chLKED IT up to some artifact. i was about 35 then. later, perhaps 10 yrs, a routine screening picked up slow pulse & i was advised to go to the dr. he was an acquaintance, v. thorough & capable, wired me, treadmill, found nada. i continued w/ my life. yrs later, BY SHEER CHANCE, i reported to our fam. dr, dint feel good, pulse down to 36. two yrs now about 6 mos, i have pacemaker. my breathing is so much btter, ita like a new set lungs. everybody should get one. i'm 77 & feeling prettygood.